Numbers Rap

In honor of Saint Patrick's Day, here's a jaunty little rhyme for March. I was once told in a very nice rejection letter that a serious math journal wouldn't publish such doggerel. But that's all right. It was fun to write. Enjoy. 

"Numbers Rap" 

by Bill Kirk 

Numbers, Numbers, all around us. 

Numbers, numbers, they astound us! 

Integers can be quite mental; 

Fractions, never transcendental. 

Counting numbers may well taunt you. 

But ignore them and they'll haunt you! 

Adding them to do your sums, 

May take fingers, toes and thumbs. 

If subtraction is your game, 

Minus signs, you'll need to tame. 

Try division if you're able. 

Multiply? You'll need a table. 

Odd times odd is odd, not even. 

Odd times even's "even Steven." 

Do your tens to reach a million; 

Times a thousand is a billion! 

When you're counting, don't be frugal. 

Who knows? You might reach a googol! 

Learning numbers is a quest. 

To succeed, just do your best.

A Snip-Clip Trip To Joe's Barber Shop

Once in a while, it's time for every young lad to get his locks trimmed. Here's a story about a little boy's trip to the barber shop and how he manages to make it through the experience. Maybe it will bring back a few memories....

A Snip-Clip Trip To Joe's Barber Shop
By Bill Kirk
(Originally published in Stories For Children Magazine, 2009)

"It's time for a haircut."
That's what my Dad said.
"It's time for the barber
To clean up your head."

"Your ears are all covered;
We can't see your eyes.
Your hair sure grows fast
For someone your size."

"We'll go to Joe's place;
His haircuts are fun.
He'll give you a prize
When your haircut is done."

We walked to Joe's Barbershop,
Just down the street.
I waited my turn,
Then I climbed on the seat.

"Just lower his ears."
Did I hear my Dad right?
Would my ears be removed?
Would they be out of sight?

"What does that mean, Dad,"
I asked with a frown?
"Will my ears be OK?
Will they be further down?"

"Don't worry, my son,"
Dad said with a smile.
"Joe's been a good barber
For quite a long while."

Joe started his work
With scissors and comb.
I wished he would hurry
So we could go home.

But before I could ask him,
"Is this gonna to hurt?"
Hair flew down the cape
That covered my shirt.

With clippers and snippers
Joe tickled my ears.
And when he was finished,
I shouted, "Three cheers!"

At last it was over,
And Joe was all through.
I looked in the mirror
To check out my "doo."

As I hopped to the floor,
Joe opened a box.
It was time for my prize
After losing my locks.

I picked a small plane--
I knew it would fly.
Then, we gave Joe a wave
As he called out, "Good-bye."

After finding my ears
And both of my eyes,
I guess it was worth it
To get such a prize.

But if you ask me,
Instead of all that,
I'd let my hair grow
And just wear a hat?

Guardian Angel Kids E-Zine For February Now Up!

The latest edition of the Guardian Angel Kids E-Zine is on the street and it's full of fun tidbits to share with your children.

M E D I A R E L E A S E

CONTACT: Donna McDine, Editor-in-Chief, Guardian Angel Kids Ezine

Email: submissions@guardian-angel-kids.com

Website: http://guardian-angel-kids.com


February 2011 is certainly coming in like a lion and hopefully spring will arrive sooner rather than later. With so many of us dealing with the frigid winter, now is the perfect time to bunker down and enjoy the February 2011 issue of Guardian Angel Kids Ezine http://www.guardian-angel-kids.com with another round of wonderful activities, short stories, poetry, and a parent/teacher article to bring excitement to your days.

Be prepared to spend memorable time as you both explore the monthly features:

Featured Books:

Does Heaven Get Mail Flip Book written by Marilee Crow and illustrated by K.C. Snider

My Grandma’s Kitchen Rules Flip Book written by Bill Kirk and illustrated by Marina Movshina

Children poetry, stories, and article:

“Tea with Grandma,” by Carol Zook thrills us with memories of tea time with grandma.

“Grandpa Bud’s Big Blue Truck,” by Allyn M. Stotz takes us on one adventure after another of treasures and practical tools from Grandpa Bud’s good old truck accompanied with a delightful illustration by Julie Hammond.

“The Wheels,” by Gabrielle Prendergast is a time spinning tale of passing traditions to one generation to the next. Samantha Bell’s illustration depicts this heartfelt story beautifully.

“Understanding Learning Styles: What Educators/Parents Need to Know,” by Dorit Sasson brings forth the different learning styles of our young muses. Sasson’s important article is for anyone having the opportunity to teach our young muses, whether it be a teacher, parent, grandparent, librarian, or tutor.

Grab your favorite snack and pull up a chair alongside your child and enjoy the interactive world of Guardian Angel Kids where the delightful stories take you on awe inspiring adventures.

Thank you for your time and interest. Full Media Kit and more are available upon request electronically.

Thoughts On The Mind-Boggling Nature Of The Universe

With every revelation of the Hubble telescope, the universe appears ever more mind boggling. According to NASA, a massive black hole has been detected by the Hubble in the M84 galaxy:

"The Space Telescope Imaging Spectrograph measured a velocity of 880,000 mph within 26 light-years of the galaxy's center. This measurement allowed astronomers to calculate that the black hole contains at least 300 million solar masses. M84 is located in the Virgo Cluster of galaxies, 50 million light-years from Earth, and a nearby neighbor to the more massive M87 galaxy, which also contains an extremely massive black hole." (NASA)

Just think of it. We are but a speck in a quite small solar system "only" several hundred million miles across. Our solar system is among millions of other solar systems inside the Milky Way galaxy, which itself is only one galaxy among millions of other galaxies, of which M84 and M87 are just two. Those two galaxies are part of a cluster of galaxies called the Virgo Cluster, which itself is 50 million light years away from us.

Being that far away means it would take us 50 million years traveling at the speed of light (about 186,282 miles per second) to get there. We're talking a l-o-o-o-o-ng road trip: something like 293,729,457,600,000,000,000 miles. I wonder how long it would take someone to get there driving 60 miles per hour? OK. You can do the math.

Perhaps even more amazingly, on top of it all, the black hole discovered inside galaxy M84 contains the masses of more than 300 million suns. And, get this, according to the NASA report, in the middle of that galaxy velocities of 880,000 miles per hour have been measured. Such high velocities are apparently used by scientists to detect the presence of a black hole as well as the amount of stuff it has already sucked into itself.

Compared to the speed of light, 880,000 miles per hour is really way slow. But just think. Traveling at that speed, it would only take us around 15 minutes to get to our moon. This is definitely one of those "things that make you go "Hmmmm". The scope is almost beyond comprehension. If you ask me, in the overall scheme of things, whether or not the furniture got dusted this week is probably not worth worrying about.

Once Upon A Teacup

"Once Upon A Teacup"
By Bill Kirk

Inside the kitchen cupboard,
That sometimes is quite bare,
There sits a special china cup,
Placed upside down with care.

The teacup's edge is broken,
For it had hit the floor.
The missing piece had left a hole
Just perfect for a door.

My Grandma keeps that teacup
To use again one day.
"As soon as I can find some glue,
I'll fix that cup," she'd say.

The cup was long forgotten,
Until a little mouse
Had moved inside it with his Dad
And made a teacup house.

Each day the mouse would wake up
And run outside to play.
Sometimes he'd find a little snack
To munch along the way.

At night, his Dad told stories
About their teacup home
And how they'd always be a pair,
Wherever they would roam.

One day they heard soft knocking
Upon their house so snug.
"Who could it be outside our door?
A spider or a bug?"

A lady mouse was looking
For a place to rest.
"Might you have some room for me,
Inside your comfy nest?"

She stayed a day, then longer.
Soon Summer changed to Fall.
She helped them make their teacup warm,
When Winter came to call.

The little mouse decided,
He liked their family.
Their teacup was the very best
Mouse-house that it could be.

But though he really liked it,
They soon ran out of space.
In Spring, they left their teacup house,
To find a bigger place.

So, if you find a teacup--
A chipped hole on one side;
And if it's tucked behind some plates,
Where little things can hide;

Although it might be dusty
And covered up with grime.
It may have been a mouse's house
Once upon a time.